reposting after deleting after posting originally late at night and not so sober.
Therapy is like surgery. Except, instead of making a clean, sterilized incision, the "surgeon" just picks at the scab and the ingrown and rotting stitches from past attempts until he pulls something loose and the wound gapes open. Then he picks through the entrails remarking at how very INTERESTING it all is. Then the timer dings and he hastily, slightly embarrassed at the miscalculation, wraps you up in a coil of thick gauze and sends you, leaking through the bandage and oozing out the sides, away, wishing you a lovely week.
Showing posts with label adventures in new york. Show all posts
Showing posts with label adventures in new york. Show all posts
Tuesday, September 16, 2008
Sunday, March 30, 2008
my favorite place in mid-town
This is Deno's Party House/Colon Hydrotherapy, at 30th and 8th. Apparently they have jello shots served by bikini clad waitresses downstairs and all natural enemas upstairs. What more could a girl want?
Wednesday, March 5, 2008
springtime in new york
Why hello there blog! Apologies once again for the long hiatus, it's been a busy month (and a half) for me. Perhaps this blog will be more of an update than an attempt at decent writing and then if I can start posting regularly I'll do more interesting stories, topics of discussion etc.
Anyhow--February was the usual roller coaster. I gave myself until the end of the month (thank you leap year) to figure out a set of things. Although I think I did pretty well over all, and came in just under the wire on a few clutch decisions, life has somehow figured out a way to dribble over into March. So, although I'd like to report that I've got it all figured out and all my shit is together, well...that might take until the middle of next week.
Here's what I've got so far-
1. I quit my job. Sort of. I'll be leaving the ol' movement at the end of May. Luckily it doesn't actually take any sort of acknowledgment or response from one's boss in order to officially quit. Otherwise it would just be my little one hand clapping or solo tree falling into the forest into eternity here in NYC and they would keep paying me. (that last part would be okay I guess)
2. I'm spending a good part of the summer in Ghana (maybe all of it!). At least I'm about 90% sure it will be Ghana. (In case you are wondering and don't have a map handy, Ghana is in West Africa, at the bottom of that chunk that sticks out on the top left part of the continent. It's on the coast and supposedly the people are really nice despite not having much water or healthcare) It could also be Ecuador or it could be Ghana AND Ecuador. Either way it will be a blast and don't worry, I'll get all my vaccinations. And I promise to bring you all back cool shit with vaguely racist or patronizing overtones like carved african masks or voodoo dolls and you can pretend to be grateful but will be slightly too embarrassed to display them in your home.
3. I'm staying in my apartment next year. I heart bed-stuy and I heart the idea of living in the same place for more than 12 months, something I haven't done since high school. I'm pretty sure eloise hearts the idea too, as much as she has loved all of her road/plane trips and foster parents. Anyway, what this really means is: More Visitors Please. You shall come and we shall stoop sit and drink cold beer in the sunshine and chat with PJ about his jeweleries and it shall be glorious.
4. Hmm. I might not have a 4. Or maybe I do and it rules but I'm just keeping it a secret. You'll have to come see me to find out.
Okay Drew, happy now? You better comment on this sucker.
Anyhow--February was the usual roller coaster. I gave myself until the end of the month (thank you leap year) to figure out a set of things. Although I think I did pretty well over all, and came in just under the wire on a few clutch decisions, life has somehow figured out a way to dribble over into March. So, although I'd like to report that I've got it all figured out and all my shit is together, well...that might take until the middle of next week.
Here's what I've got so far-
1. I quit my job. Sort of. I'll be leaving the ol' movement at the end of May. Luckily it doesn't actually take any sort of acknowledgment or response from one's boss in order to officially quit. Otherwise it would just be my little one hand clapping or solo tree falling into the forest into eternity here in NYC and they would keep paying me. (that last part would be okay I guess)
2. I'm spending a good part of the summer in Ghana (maybe all of it!). At least I'm about 90% sure it will be Ghana. (In case you are wondering and don't have a map handy, Ghana is in West Africa, at the bottom of that chunk that sticks out on the top left part of the continent. It's on the coast and supposedly the people are really nice despite not having much water or healthcare) It could also be Ecuador or it could be Ghana AND Ecuador. Either way it will be a blast and don't worry, I'll get all my vaccinations. And I promise to bring you all back cool shit with vaguely racist or patronizing overtones like carved african masks or voodoo dolls and you can pretend to be grateful but will be slightly too embarrassed to display them in your home.
3. I'm staying in my apartment next year. I heart bed-stuy and I heart the idea of living in the same place for more than 12 months, something I haven't done since high school. I'm pretty sure eloise hearts the idea too, as much as she has loved all of her road/plane trips and foster parents. Anyway, what this really means is: More Visitors Please. You shall come and we shall stoop sit and drink cold beer in the sunshine and chat with PJ about his jeweleries and it shall be glorious.
4. Hmm. I might not have a 4. Or maybe I do and it rules but I'm just keeping it a secret. You'll have to come see me to find out.
Okay Drew, happy now? You better comment on this sucker.
Wednesday, November 21, 2007
Sorry for not getting my shit together and posting more often. Drew's right, it's a lot of pressure.
Last weekend I rode the Flavors of Fall wave, which was so goddamn fun I literally suffered from withdrawal for a couple of days. There's something about getting 15 great friends together to eat and drink amazing amounts of food and wine and beer and whiskey that reminds you how much better it is than Thanksgiving with ones actual family. (and we're already planning Volume 3, the Illinois edition)
Sorry if this post is about to devolve into some trite "gosh we're all growing up" reflection, but we are, and it's pretty awesome actually. In college DF cut his face open trying to jump over a stop sign and CB (not me) was nearly expelled from the dorms for setting the bathroom on fire. Now we are a lawyer, a writer, an architect, a husband, a designer, a former accountant who just quit to open a nightclub. Some of us are still students and many of us are still artists, and I don't think we've lost much of the spark yet. But now we're also people who rent tables and chairs and buy tupperware and make cupcakes that look like turkeys (though to be fair that was brett's sister who did that).
Over the weekend I spent a lot of time thinking about how lucky we were to have each other like this (And how lucky I am in particular. I elbowed my way into these kids senior year when they had all been friends since the dorms and it may have been one of the best things I've done).
8000 calories later I crashed pretty hard. A friend warned me that the new york blues hits everyone after a few months. There are so many people and there's so much to do all the time, so feeling lonely can be so much more isolating and confusing than anywhere else.
But, I'm snapping out of it and wouldn't give up the weekend for the world. And here comes the cheesy part where I thank you all and say happy thanksgiving. :)
Last weekend I rode the Flavors of Fall wave, which was so goddamn fun I literally suffered from withdrawal for a couple of days. There's something about getting 15 great friends together to eat and drink amazing amounts of food and wine and beer and whiskey that reminds you how much better it is than Thanksgiving with ones actual family. (and we're already planning Volume 3, the Illinois edition)
Sorry if this post is about to devolve into some trite "gosh we're all growing up" reflection, but we are, and it's pretty awesome actually. In college DF cut his face open trying to jump over a stop sign and CB (not me) was nearly expelled from the dorms for setting the bathroom on fire. Now we are a lawyer, a writer, an architect, a husband, a designer, a former accountant who just quit to open a nightclub. Some of us are still students and many of us are still artists, and I don't think we've lost much of the spark yet. But now we're also people who rent tables and chairs and buy tupperware and make cupcakes that look like turkeys (though to be fair that was brett's sister who did that).
Over the weekend I spent a lot of time thinking about how lucky we were to have each other like this (And how lucky I am in particular. I elbowed my way into these kids senior year when they had all been friends since the dorms and it may have been one of the best things I've done).
8000 calories later I crashed pretty hard. A friend warned me that the new york blues hits everyone after a few months. There are so many people and there's so much to do all the time, so feeling lonely can be so much more isolating and confusing than anywhere else.
But, I'm snapping out of it and wouldn't give up the weekend for the world. And here comes the cheesy part where I thank you all and say happy thanksgiving. :)
Tuesday, November 6, 2007
Bed-Stuy Do or Die
Some of you have had the great privilege of hanging out in my neighborhood, but for those who haven’t been so lucky, here is a little glimpse into life in the 11216.
Today as I was walking to the subway I saw a great chair sitting on the curb next to a bag of trash. It was small and cute and wooden and sturdy and I NEED a chair (and we need about 13 chairs for next weekends “Flavors of Fall” feast). So, I grabbed it and started walking back to my house.
Just when I was about to get my prize home, here’s what happened-
Man (visibly wobbling a bit and slurring his words, sorta saunters over to me): Hey! That’s MY chair!
Me: What? No, this was just sitting on the curb by the trash. (Remember this is a NICE chair and I NEED a chair!)
Man: No! That’s MY CHAIR. ASDFJASDFFF (something I couldn’t understand)
Me: Oh. You mean, you were planning to take it? (figuring at this point I might as well give it up if he had his eye on it first)
Man: Ticket?? I don’t got no Ticket! There’s no TICKET?!
Me: Uh. TAKE IT. Were you going to TAKE the CHAIR?
Woman (comes over from the stoop she was sitting on and starts yelling at me): JUST TAKE THE CHAIR! TAKE THE CHAIR. TAKE. THE. CHAIR.
Woman (yelling at the man): GIVE HER THE CHAIR. That ain’t your CHAIR! That AIN’T your CHAIR!
Woman (continuing to yell at me): TAKE THE CHAIR TAKE THE CHAIR!!!
Me: (grabbing the chair, running into apartment) Uh. Thanks!
Man (yelling after me): Don’t say black people never did nothing for you!!
Today as I was walking to the subway I saw a great chair sitting on the curb next to a bag of trash. It was small and cute and wooden and sturdy and I NEED a chair (and we need about 13 chairs for next weekends “Flavors of Fall” feast). So, I grabbed it and started walking back to my house.
Just when I was about to get my prize home, here’s what happened-
Man (visibly wobbling a bit and slurring his words, sorta saunters over to me): Hey! That’s MY chair!
Me: What? No, this was just sitting on the curb by the trash. (Remember this is a NICE chair and I NEED a chair!)
Man: No! That’s MY CHAIR. ASDFJASDFFF (something I couldn’t understand)
Me: Oh. You mean, you were planning to take it? (figuring at this point I might as well give it up if he had his eye on it first)
Man: Ticket?? I don’t got no Ticket! There’s no TICKET?!
Me: Uh. TAKE IT. Were you going to TAKE the CHAIR?
Woman (comes over from the stoop she was sitting on and starts yelling at me): JUST TAKE THE CHAIR! TAKE THE CHAIR. TAKE. THE. CHAIR.
Woman (yelling at the man): GIVE HER THE CHAIR. That ain’t your CHAIR! That AIN’T your CHAIR!
Woman (continuing to yell at me): TAKE THE CHAIR TAKE THE CHAIR!!!
Me: (grabbing the chair, running into apartment) Uh. Thanks!
Man (yelling after me): Don’t say black people never did nothing for you!!
Monday, October 29, 2007
monday, MONDAY!
Hello! A short and sweet post before diving into the week. Today is shaping up well. It's beautifully sunny but excitingly sunny for the first time. As a reward for this cold weather I got to wear one of my favorite shirts with those little holes for your thumbs in the sleeves (the kind that comes with the holes, not self made) As an added bonus, my favorite breakfast stand guy now knows my order without my having to say anything (he holds up one egg and grins while nodding and says "skim milk in your coffee?") All topping off a great weekend (I almost forgot to pull the fake spiderwebs off of my coat before leaving the house this morning.)
Hooray monday!
Hooray monday!
Tuesday, October 16, 2007
we are sorry for the delay, please be patient
(for an even BETTER post on a very similar subject that was written BEFORE this post you should all read Dan's blog here then you should all shame me for blatantly copying)
I hope you're not expecting much after a long hiatus. The problem is I let things bump around in my head for so long that by the time I get up the gumption to put it down in pixels it feels like there's nothing left to say. Sort of like being in an fuzzy, ambiguous relationship where you both keep saying that you "really should TALK" about it but by the time you gather your thoughts and your courage to do so if feels like everything's already been said.
Anyway, a puff piece to get me back on the blog train:
Speaking of train...
I feel like some community group must have gotten together and sued the MTA after the 2003 blackouts (when people were stuck in trains for hours) or something because now whenever there's a delay of even a few seconds the train operators are shockingly and sometimes jarringly specific about the delay. Yes, this is refreshing and my information obsessed brain appreciates it, but sometimes it's just too much. Usually the delay is pretty benign "We're sorry for the delay, there's a C train stopped ahead of us on the track, please be patient" but in the past few weeks I've heard "There is a medical emergency in the 4th car, we are waiting for emergency personnel", "There is a police action in the 1st car, we are waiting for the situation to be cleared", "There is a man standing on the tracks in front of the train, we are waiting for him to move".
I think how meta it must feel, for example, to be in the 1st car where the "police action" is happening. Watching the police storm in and surround whoever it is they are looking for, mentally calculating the chances of being hit by a stray bullet, and hearing an announcement at the same time "please be patient, there is a police action in the 1st car" as if the droning bored voice of the train operator is god on a very slow day.
I hope you're not expecting much after a long hiatus. The problem is I let things bump around in my head for so long that by the time I get up the gumption to put it down in pixels it feels like there's nothing left to say. Sort of like being in an fuzzy, ambiguous relationship where you both keep saying that you "really should TALK" about it but by the time you gather your thoughts and your courage to do so if feels like everything's already been said.
Anyway, a puff piece to get me back on the blog train:
Speaking of train...
I feel like some community group must have gotten together and sued the MTA after the 2003 blackouts (when people were stuck in trains for hours) or something because now whenever there's a delay of even a few seconds the train operators are shockingly and sometimes jarringly specific about the delay. Yes, this is refreshing and my information obsessed brain appreciates it, but sometimes it's just too much. Usually the delay is pretty benign "We're sorry for the delay, there's a C train stopped ahead of us on the track, please be patient" but in the past few weeks I've heard "There is a medical emergency in the 4th car, we are waiting for emergency personnel", "There is a police action in the 1st car, we are waiting for the situation to be cleared", "There is a man standing on the tracks in front of the train, we are waiting for him to move".
I think how meta it must feel, for example, to be in the 1st car where the "police action" is happening. Watching the police storm in and surround whoever it is they are looking for, mentally calculating the chances of being hit by a stray bullet, and hearing an announcement at the same time "please be patient, there is a police action in the 1st car" as if the droning bored voice of the train operator is god on a very slow day.
Monday, September 17, 2007
The elevator is painfully slow (think Winter street office in Boston, or Temple Place) and I work on the 10th floor. Today I shared it with a grey, tired looking man. Together we watched the digital numbers and silently counted along 2...3...4... Finally the display showed 8 and the elevator gave a bright *ding!* and groaned to a stop. The man readied himself to exit and whispered, softly, prayer-like, “Take care”.
There was a pause before the doors opened. Too long. And suddenly the man was embarrassed. He shuffled his feet, looked side to side, then, as soon as he was able, darted out without looking back.
There was a pause before the doors opened. Too long. And suddenly the man was embarrassed. He shuffled his feet, looked side to side, then, as soon as he was able, darted out without looking back.
Sunday, September 16, 2007
Dear Denver,
I'm not sure how to say this, but I think it might be best for us to have an open relationship for a while. I still love you and I think we have a great future together; no other city has dive bars like you do (I still have my first chip from the Park Tavern), I'll always remember my first trip on the 16th street mall shuttle and getting snowed in twice in one winter (hooray hot chocolate and snowmen in the park!). You're a beautiful and amazing city Denver, and I haven't even started talking about your people yet (definitely one of your best assets).
But (and I think it's better that you hear this from me), I've met another city. New York. I never expected this to happen. Like I said, there's no city like you, Denver. But New York, with its street fairs and block parties and concerts and literary festivals and all night transportation, well, to be honest it's pretty sexy and it's confusing me a little. And it's all happening so fast. It's probably just that it's so new and exciting, and eventually I'll realize what a terrible mistake I'm making. But for now, would it be okay if we took a little break?
This will be good for us I think, it will help us grow and appreciate each other more. And, well, I know Boulder's been looking cute lately and has always had a thing for you Denver, maybe you should spread your wild oats a bit too?
Don't take this the wrong way, you're still the number one city in my book, and I hope you won't mind if I still come visit. Let's just try this new thing out for awhile and see how it goes.
Big Hug!
Crystal
I'm not sure how to say this, but I think it might be best for us to have an open relationship for a while. I still love you and I think we have a great future together; no other city has dive bars like you do (I still have my first chip from the Park Tavern), I'll always remember my first trip on the 16th street mall shuttle and getting snowed in twice in one winter (hooray hot chocolate and snowmen in the park!). You're a beautiful and amazing city Denver, and I haven't even started talking about your people yet (definitely one of your best assets).
But (and I think it's better that you hear this from me), I've met another city. New York. I never expected this to happen. Like I said, there's no city like you, Denver. But New York, with its street fairs and block parties and concerts and literary festivals and all night transportation, well, to be honest it's pretty sexy and it's confusing me a little. And it's all happening so fast. It's probably just that it's so new and exciting, and eventually I'll realize what a terrible mistake I'm making. But for now, would it be okay if we took a little break?
This will be good for us I think, it will help us grow and appreciate each other more. And, well, I know Boulder's been looking cute lately and has always had a thing for you Denver, maybe you should spread your wild oats a bit too?
Don't take this the wrong way, you're still the number one city in my book, and I hope you won't mind if I still come visit. Let's just try this new thing out for awhile and see how it goes.
Big Hug!
Crystal
Tuesday, September 11, 2007
My cheap $197.50 weekend
The plan this weekend was to save money and start living like the starving student I now am. I had an amazing plan, stay in Friday night, bypass the Modest Mouse show in favor of the free Brooklyn Block Party featuring Talib Kweli, then a free "interpretive dance" performance on Sunday and watching the VMAs on Sunday night. ALL FREE SHIT, right? WRONG. Here's how I spent $197.50 in two days.
Saturday-Decided to spend the morning studying at my favorite coffee shop (I just read a review of it that said "every time I come to the Outpost I see someone famous, like M.I.A. , who lives in the neighborhood". Seriously? M.I.A? That rules!) which also meant spending $15 on two iced coffees plus breakfast and lunch (stupid stupid, and never saw anyone famous). Next came $12.50 on cleaning shit for the apartment so my roommate doesn't start to hate me. Next came $5 on a dress that I bought in a panic after being invited to a fancy fashion designer party (yeah, $5, and that's rounding up. I love my neighborhood).
Next stop, block party! Here I was pretty good (hard to spend too much at a free block party) UNTIL we got bored waiting for Talib Kweli. (local acts came first, including the all white reggae band and the woman who kept infusing her songs with public service announcements like 'remember to fill out your w2s!' and 'teach your kids to spell!') so I spent $27 at the bar next to the park. (hey, guys, I'll get this round!)
Next stop, swanky party. Yeah! Also free, right? WRONG! In order to impress the guy who called me Melissa all night the last time I met him, I decided the nice thing to do would be to bring him a $30 bottle of vodka (his birthday after all), which I mostly drank myself because I felt so weirdly out of place at the party (and he still didn't remember my name). Also, did not wear the $5 dress, which may have been a mistake. Also, according to the receipts and a vague memory of eating potato chips on the train, I bought some food after the party ($9).
Sunday-All aboard express train to hangover-ville. Dragged myself out of bed (people are dragged, right? like hanged?) to obligatory hangover brunch ($15) then to hangover movie ($11) and hangover getting-duped-out-of-$7-by-con-artist/fellow-human-in-need/homeless-man. ($7). Then, $20 for new shoes after mine literally fell apart in the west village and I hobbled into the nearest overpriced shoe store and bought the cheapest ones. Then, wine and dessert ($20) to impress my new friend d at her tv watching party. THEN, $20 on a cab home that should have cost $6 because the driver got lost and I was too tired to argue.
Oh yeah, almost forgot the $76 subway pass I bought. Plus a ton of coffee. Which brings us up to the grand total of $197.50
Man, so, the theme is a) I spend money on stupid shit and b) I spend money on stupid stuff trying to impress people. Luckily for you guys, you may be the next person I buy stupid stuff for in order to impress.
Saturday-Decided to spend the morning studying at my favorite coffee shop (I just read a review of it that said "every time I come to the Outpost I see someone famous, like M.I.A. , who lives in the neighborhood". Seriously? M.I.A? That rules!) which also meant spending $15 on two iced coffees plus breakfast and lunch (stupid stupid, and never saw anyone famous). Next came $12.50 on cleaning shit for the apartment so my roommate doesn't start to hate me. Next came $5 on a dress that I bought in a panic after being invited to a fancy fashion designer party (yeah, $5, and that's rounding up. I love my neighborhood).
Next stop, block party! Here I was pretty good (hard to spend too much at a free block party) UNTIL we got bored waiting for Talib Kweli. (local acts came first, including the all white reggae band and the woman who kept infusing her songs with public service announcements like 'remember to fill out your w2s!' and 'teach your kids to spell!') so I spent $27 at the bar next to the park. (hey, guys, I'll get this round!)
Next stop, swanky party. Yeah! Also free, right? WRONG! In order to impress the guy who called me Melissa all night the last time I met him, I decided the nice thing to do would be to bring him a $30 bottle of vodka (his birthday after all), which I mostly drank myself because I felt so weirdly out of place at the party (and he still didn't remember my name). Also, did not wear the $5 dress, which may have been a mistake. Also, according to the receipts and a vague memory of eating potato chips on the train, I bought some food after the party ($9).
Sunday-All aboard express train to hangover-ville. Dragged myself out of bed (people are dragged, right? like hanged?) to obligatory hangover brunch ($15) then to hangover movie ($11) and hangover getting-duped-out-of-$7-by-con-artist/fellow-human-in-need/homeless-man. ($7). Then, $20 for new shoes after mine literally fell apart in the west village and I hobbled into the nearest overpriced shoe store and bought the cheapest ones. Then, wine and dessert ($20) to impress my new friend d at her tv watching party. THEN, $20 on a cab home that should have cost $6 because the driver got lost and I was too tired to argue.
Oh yeah, almost forgot the $76 subway pass I bought. Plus a ton of coffee. Which brings us up to the grand total of $197.50
Man, so, the theme is a) I spend money on stupid shit and b) I spend money on stupid stuff trying to impress people. Luckily for you guys, you may be the next person I buy stupid stuff for in order to impress.
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